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Let me start by telling you a story. Raymond was on his first marriage and only marriage. He was a bully and determined that his wife was not going to divorce him.  That day, he was upset and had called on the phone suggesting that if I had any influence over women and "was a man of God" as he put it, then I would tell her that "she needs to get her life together and understand that God had placed her in my life and I want it to stay that way."  I refused to tell him if she had made an appointment.

He showed up the next day a few hours before Mary's appointment.  After a short conversation, he was told that he needed an appointment or he had to leave. The police were called and he left the building before they arrived.

Mary was so pleasant. The heart she had was amazing. She called him during the session to inform him that she was not coming home, and had packed what she needed for a few weeks. His voice boomed as he yelled and demanded she come home right now. There...

It was not easy to see this as a truth until I was almost friendless. When I had money, everyone was around. As soon as I was not in their world, they didn't call or even want to be around me.  I acted as if  I didn't care. But I did care.

The fakeness was hard to stomach. I was being so fake. All I could think about was how angry my wife was at me all the time. As long as we were good financially we got along. I didn't want to own anything she said about me. Those words were just not true. She was being a B.. and I didn't care for that at all.  Surely there was someone out there that would love me for who I was.

Then my son got sick. Nothing worked.  My faith failed me. I prayed.  We all did. He didn't live. I never knew how angry I really was.  I left my business to my team and took time off.  It spiraled out of control, my wife refused to talk to me, and my own deep self was hurting so bad.

Emotions were NEVER important as a kid. Dad was so kind...

1. Forgiveness

Forgiveness is one of the most difficult skills to conquer all types of behavior in mankind. 

Next to judgementalness, it is the reason for more conflict and damage than any other. Often we think that hatred or anger is the most devastating emotion, however, anger and hatred come from one of the more core emotions; judgmentalness or unforgiveness. 

Because of the way our minds are structured to respond to our environment, we tend to make logical decisions based on our emotional state.  When we are wronged, we feel the normal emotional response just like we would to any pain.  A kick in the knee brings pain and it subsides depending on the level of the pain. 

Pain in our emotions also subsides, depending on the level of the event.   Since we are all individuals, we all have different ways of handling pain. Some people have more tolerance, some don’t.  That is just how it is.

A truth is: 

Unforgiveness tops the list of...